He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Randomize
