my vag is so smooth its legendary
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
Randomize
