After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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