Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize