Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Randomize
