It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
