That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
barbara walters just said penis...
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Randomize
