i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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