I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I think my moral compass just broke
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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