It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Randomize
