i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Did I show you my penis last night?
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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