She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Randomize
