when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
More tranny stories later!
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
