these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
