I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
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