What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
