My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
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