I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
