why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
