Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
