Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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