Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
The uberlube is also flammable
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
