I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
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