He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
what day is it and did you see me today?
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Randomize
