Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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