I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
