finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
