so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
worst night to have a conscience
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize