and next time when you feel me up, do it right
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
