Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
