Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
