the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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