It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
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