I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Moan for me like Helen Keller
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
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