but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
