We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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