Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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