I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize