he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
