so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
