i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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