He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Randomize
