What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
No stitches, just platelets and will power
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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