people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
