I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
