I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
