i permit you to call me
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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