I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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