They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize