Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize