okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Randomize
